Joke Issue 2018

Student govenment passes resolution to pat selves on back


Ryan Moore, Has to ask Student Gov’t for Echo’s budget


As the academic year comes to a close for Augsburg Day Student Government (ADSG), and members of student government bring their terms to an end, they are scrambling to pass last-minute pieces of legislation. This is very common practice in government as President Obama signed many bills before reluctantly handing the keys to Air Force One over to Trump; god knows what type of legislation Trump will pass — if he even makes it to the end of his term.

Among the plethora of resolutions being pushed through ADSG, there is one that rises above the rest. The most important of the end-of-year work being done by ADSG is the resolution most recently passed this week. This resolution calls for ADSG to pat themselves on the back after a long year of being the presiding government of Augsburg’s day students.

“I really think this resolution is totally called for and necessary,” said Mike Grewe, advisor of ADSG. “Student government has had a long year of doing… well, whatever it is they do, and praise is surely in order.”

Carrying out this resolution is expected to cost way more than you’d think it possibly could. This is because ADSG ran into a large sum of money after a number of student organizations did not survive the recommissioning process. Additionally, because of the size of ADSG, it takes a lot of capital to pat that many people on the back.

“This type of work from Augsburg Day Student Government is truly monumental,” said President Pribbenow. “I am pleased with the work they have been doing all year. However, we cannot forget that I have to approve anything ADSG wished to do before it can get off the ground.”

The Echo will continue to follow this resolution as it slowly but surely makes its way through the process of getting enacted. However, as of press time, nothing has really happened.

This article first appeared in the Friday, April 6th Edition of The Echo